Never
by Forlorn Maiden
Summary: What if Naraku/Onigumo's plan had gone accordingly and Kikyou did wish on the jewel? He'd wanted to make her his, and now he has the chance.
1. Prey

**Disclaimer:** Rumiko Takahashi owns Inuyasha, not me!

**Summary:** What if Naraku/Onigumo's plan had went accordingly and Kikyou did wish on the jewel? He'd wanted to make her his, and now he has the chance.

**Author's Note:** Ever since I read vol 18 of Inuyasha and finding out that Naraku had lied in vol 8, and was really planning to make Kikyou his, instead of tearing her to shreds like he told Inuyasha, I wondered how it'd be like. I have read a lot of NarKik and enjoyed them, but I was saddened at how they would not continue the story and finish. I implore you NarKik authors to finish your stories because they're great.

**Warnings:** I recommend this for older teen to mature readers, this fanfic is my **_darkest_** yet and it **_contains_** rape, attempt suicide, abuse, and abortion. THIS IS NOT TO BE TAKEN LIGHTLY! If this is not your cup of tea or you are sensitive to these things DO NOT READ AND PLEASE LEAVE NOW before it's too late. Also, in the beginning there's spoilers for ep 148.

XXX

"INUYASHA!"

The fleeing hanyou turned for a second to gaze once more upon the woman whom he believed, deceived him; but as he saw her, he also saw the arrow that struck him in the heart. How fitting, he bitterly thought, the woman whom he loved impaled him with an arrow at his already, broken heart.

"Ki...Kikyou..." he reached out his hand to her, "You...How dare you..."

Then his eyes started to close and his hearing clouded. The woman, whom he did not see covered in blood, staggered towards the jewel and knelt down before it. Her younger sister and the villagers ran quickly towards the injured woman.

"Kikyou-sama!" They called.

"That's a horrible wound!" one stated.

"Onee-sama, these injuries..." her sister said.

The woman took the jewel and brought it to he chest. She no longer wished to live, the man she loved had betrayed her and her dreams to build a family with him, have died.

Meanwhile, the hanyou sealed against the tree, watched her, though he could not see the wound on her shoulder nor the blood that dripped from it. _And I still believe in you..._ He remembered the moment they had shared the previous evening, when she looked into his eyes saying, '_You don't need to say anything else._' when he was about to confess his love for her.

He finally put down his out-stretched hand, "Ah well, I guess it's fine. Kikyou, this sort of thing proves you are the woman I thought you were. Pure, sublime, and strong. That's Kikyou the priestess. And I love..." his mind was cut off, as the spell placed upon him began its effect. His eyes closed, and an eternal sleep welcomed him.

Kikyou had just purified the jewel in her hand, "Shikon no Tama...It was all for this..."

Suddenly she clutched herself in pain. The priestess knew she wasn't going to be able to stand it anymore. Her little sister looked at her, as if she knew what she was going to say, "No Onee-sama, don't think about giving up. Don't leave me here all alone."

She smiled at her precious sister, bittersweetly, "I'll always be with you, Kaede."

"But not in body, only in spirit." she began to cry. "Then soon you'll pass on to the next life."

"Kaede..." Somewhere inside her a voice called out to her, _Why should you follow him in death? Why should you leave your beloved sister behind for the man who betrayed you? You were willing to sacrifice everything for him and he betrayed you! Live, live on Kikyou, live on this world and forget the bastard who endeavored to kill you!_

"You promised me, sister," Kaede weeped. "you promised to stay with me, and be there for me, as Mother and Father were not."

"I will have to die sooner or later."

"Then let it be later, I need you Onee-sama..." Kaede was still too young to understand the power and curse of the jewel. Yes, she was being selfish but wouldn't any little girl, who was about to lose her sister? The only one who has cared for her.

Kikyou glanced at her crying sister, she couldn't bare it, she loved her too much to deny her, _Shikon no Tama please help me. Please heal me from these wounds, I pray that you grant my wish! Please don't let me die!_

With that, she glowed and saw black.

XXX

Kikyou awoke from her slumber, sitting up and wondering where she was and soon realized she was home. Her sister was lying beside her, sleeping. Kaede was very worried and had stayed by her side. Kaede's eyes fluttered then opened, seeing her sister awake, she smiled, "Onee-sama."

"Kaede," she said and patted her little sister's head.

"Do you want anything? Need anything?"

"No." she replied. All she wanted was to be rid of the pain she felt in her heart. The feeling of betrayal from the man who betrayed her. Kaede looked at her and quitely said, "I'm sorry."

"Kaede don't apologize, it wasn't your fault." Kikyou said.

The remaining day, Kikyou was too weak to move and therefore, was excused from her duties. Kaede gladly took on the responsibilities of her sister. When night came and Kaede had gone to sleep, Kikyou forced herself to stand. She walked outside and crossed her arms, hugging herself for comfort from the chilly night, but mostly because she was comforting herself.

She looked up at the stars. They were beautiful, and last night she had spent gazing upon them after a certain boatride, with a certain love. _Inuyasha, why? How could you do this to me? I was willing to do anything for you because I love you! But you betrayed me. You were planning this the whole time weren't you? Damn you, damnit all!_

Kikyou collapsed on the ground and sobbed.

XXX

It was late, she shouldn't have gone out here; but she had to see. It took her a little more than half and hour to compose herself, she couldn't help but cry; it was a good thing Kaede did not hear. She didn't want her sister to worry. Deciding to venture off, she took her prized weapon, making sure not to repeat history and make herself easy prey.

She walked towards the spot, and there he was, sleeping so peacefully. He looked so cute in his unconscious state. She clenched her bow in anger, asking her self how could she not sense it.

_I was a fool. Naïve, to believe that a half-demon would love me._

A figure walked out of the shadows of the trees and revealed itself into the moon light, "Hello Kikyou."

Kikyou swiftly turned around, "Who are you?"

The figure was clothed in a baboon pelt. He chuckled, "I see. You did not sense me did you?"

"Who are you and what business do you have here?" she asked impatiently. He walked closer towards her, "My name is Naraku and I have business with _you_."

"You're a demon...Or should I say hanyou?" Kikyou stated. She glared at him with contempt, "I see. You want the jewel."

He laughed, "Indeed. But that's not the only thing I want." Kikyou looked at him with disgust, she wasn't new to this kind of situation, and she knew what he wanted was her. She had killed not only youkai but also humans, if it was necesscary. They come attacking her for the jewel, and if they wanted- taking her with them. Of course she disposed of them, immediately.

"Don't flatter me." she said.

"I see you are still weak from the encounter with your lover." he saw for a moment that she was shocked, but then quickly regained her cold façade. "Yes, Kikyou I know."

Kikyou reached for her quiver, but before she could draw an arrow, the preditor had used his agility and grabbed her by the waist and cover her mouth with his hand. With Kikyou in his posession, he took off.

He took her to an all farmiliar cave, the one where a thief Kikyou was looking after was kept. She wondered why they were here? And where was Onigumo? The area where he laid was barren and wondered if a fire got out of control and burned him. Strange, not even his remains were shown. Something she did know was, an evil aura hung around the spot.

"Why have you brought me here?" she demanded after his hand left her mouth.

"Why else?" he took the jewel that hung around her neck. She refused to let him have it and gave a fight, but in the end it was futile. She had lost her spiritual powers in sealing Inuyasha, and now she was defenseless. Though, Kikyou knew she would regain them in due time, but now she was worried- how would she defend herself against him?

"Kikyou," he said her name as she watched the jewel become polluted by his touch. It was extremely obvious that his demonic aura was powerful. She reached for her arrows but realized there was a problem. _One? They must've fallen out when I was being brought here! Damnit it's not enough, this would do no good if my power has diminished. Damn you Naraku!_ She tried plunging her long bow into him, but to no avail; and when she tried to run, a tentacle grabbed her around the wrist and pulled her closer to him. The tentacle reverted back into his hand, his eyes locked with her fearful ones, "I finally have you. Now you're mine."

"I belong to no one, _least_ of all to a hanyou such as yourself." she spat back. He glared at her and pushed her against the wall, obviously angered by what she said, "We will see."

"Don't you touch me!" she hissed. _Inuyasha..._

Her clothing torn from her, and her innocence ripped from her in the most immoral way. Her screams and pleads only encouraged him to continue his ravishment. He reveled in the way he was causing her pain and torment- how he claimed her, marking her relentlessly. Her skin was covered with her blood and bruises, inflicted by his talons digging into her flesh and him hitting her. The priestess was powerless against him and when he finished with his unbridled passion, it was dawn. He bounded her, but she knew he wouldn't kill her, after satisfying his lust.

Naraku told her he'd be right back, "Now that you're mine, I'm never letting you go."

**END**

**Author's Note: **I was considering making more chapters, but maybe such a fic should stay a oneshot. If you want more, _maybe _I'll make a sequel. Please review and tell me what you think and if you do want a sequel say in the review please.

**Hanyou**- half-demon

**Onee-sama**- respectable way of saying, ' older sister'

**Youkai-** full demon

**PS:** I feel as if this could have been better, I just don't know how though. Constructive critizing is welcomed.


	2. Revelation

**3/29/06: This has been edited, spelling and grammer. I did not change or add or delete any part of the original chapter.**

**Disclaimer:** If it was mine, Kikyou would be traveling with the group and it (manga) would've probably ended by now, I would've had a hard time keeping it long. Nope not mine. Rumiko Takahashi owns it.

**Warnings:** If you are easily offended by rape and abuse, stay away! This is not a happy story! This story contains non-consensual sex, abuse, profanity, and other things. It's also a NarKik story.

**Never**

**Revelation**

**x**

**-**

**x**

She ran as fast as her feet could carry her, panting and exhausted. She had awoken to find her sister out of bed and wondered where she could've run off to. She searched the village, but to no avail; then she went straight to the forest, "Oneesama!" she called. When Kaede arrived at her destination, the sacred tree, she only saw Inuyasha, still sealed against the tree, although her eye did spot an arrow. _Her arrow. _Kikyou's little sister picked it up and panicked, _where could she be?_ She saw another arrow, realizing there was a trail, she followed it. Unfortunately, the trail of her sister's arrows was cut short. Her heart began to beat faster and pound harder, and Kaede became _frightened, did something bad happen to her? Please don't let it be so..._

_"Oneesama!"_ she shrieked.

-

_"Now that you're mine, I'm never letting you go."_

Those were his words, before he left her in that forsaken cave to gather food for her. She refused to eat the food he brought her so after a while they whisked off to a palace, where he killed the lord and took over. He told the servants that he'd spare them, if they followed under his commands.

_He will never let me go, _she hated that fact. She hated how she was weak. At least Kaede was free from his grasp. As long as she was safe, Kikyou could find happiness in that little fact.

Kikyou was on the floor and Naraku towered over her. He knelt down next to her and pulled her hair, causing her head to be pulled back to look at him. Naraku grinned, "You're no longer innocent. _I_ claimed you as mine." Kikyou glared at him and spat at his face, "I'm not property, bastard." Only to receive a slap by him, then she lacerated his cheek in retaliation. He released his hold on her hair, "Your beloved Inuyasha can't help you. You fell into my trap." Kikyou looked up at him, "_What?_" Naraku laughed and explained his origins and every detail of his well-fabricated plot.

Kikyou's eyes widened as he told his tale, "_Damn you!_" she pounded her fists on the floor, _How could I have been so foolish?_ She started to cry, cursing herself and the demon who has held her captive. Naraku reveled in the pain he had caused her, what a sadist. "Kikyou this was all for you. I needed that hanyou out of the way."

"Lust is not _love_." She hissed. "I live on for my _sister_, not you."

"Ah yes. Your sister." Naraku began. "Maybe she should be dealt with." Kikyou looked at him with contempt, "_Don't_ you _dare_ lay a finger on her, you _hateful_ monster." Naraku smiled, "Kikyou you've lost everything. The jewel, Inuyasha, your innocence, and your life span as a human." Kikyou continued to cry, knowing all the things he said was true, and now she couldn't even die early because he wished for her to have the life span of a demon, like him. _Inuyasha I'm so sorry..._ Naraku left her to her tears, glad that he was breaking her.

-

She decided to look if Kikyou was in Onigumo's cave, to her surprise Onigumo was not there but her sister's torn clothing. _Onigumo must've been burned, but what's Oneesama's clothing doing here and torn to shreds? Oh no...! I have to find her!_

"Are you looking for someone little girl?" a man from shadows asked.

Kaede turned around, startled as she wasn't expecting anyone here, "Huh?"

"Are you?"

"Yes. I'm looking for my sister. Have you seen a woman with long black hair, very pale skin, brown eyes?"

"A lot of women fit that description." He said. "But there is a lady residing with me, she's lost and longs for her sister. Would you like to see if it is her?"

"No," she answered. _It's bad enough for me to be talking to strangers, but to actually **go with **one? I'm not insane!_ "But thank you. I must take my leave, sir." The next thing she knew, she was fighting for her freedom and screaming for help. The man told her, "This is why children should _never_ talk to strangers."

-

Naraku arrived at the castle, a servant greeted him, "M'Lord welcome back."

Kaede looked around, and when the servant called him 'M'Lord' it confirmed her curiosity of why they were here at a castle. She glared at him, still in his arms, "A lord would kidnap a little girl? What would a _lord_ want with me? Unhand me!" _Did he take me in to be his whore?_ "Am I to be your servant? Am I to be your concubine? Wife?" It's not uncommon for a lord to marry someone a lot younger than him, so the woman was young enough to bear him loads of children, which sickened her, but she hasn't even become of age yet.

He chuckled, "Foolish girl, I already have a woman to be my wife."

"Some lords do have more than one wife." She stated matter-of-factly, but was glad he wouldn't make her his wife. _He wouldn't make me his concubine would he?_

"Hold your tongue, child!" the servant chided. "A woman, let alone a _girl_ should not talk to a _lord_ in that manner."

"I don't follow these condescending rules, and I refuse to!" she yelled. Naraku started walking up the steps, "Considering who her sister is, don't expect her to be obedient, except to her sister." The servant bowed as Naraku walked inside.

"You are just like your sister." He told her then dropped her on the floor. She looked up at him, "Hey!" Then she heard someone cry, she got up and followed the noise. Naraku followed her, in a room a woman in a kimono was crying. Her eyes widened as she realized, "Oneesama!" Kikyou looked up to see her sister, "Kaede!" and they embraced. Kikyou stroked her hair and pulled Kaede away from her a little bit, "Are you all right? Are you hurt?" she looked up to see Naraku, "I told you she was to be left alone!" He ignored her and left.

"I am so sorry, you were brought into this." She embraced her sister tighter. Kaede looked at her sister, "He 'hurt' you didn't he?" Kikyou looked away, not able to answer. Kaede embraced her tighter too, trying to comfort her broken sister, "I should be the sorry one. Oneesama what do we do?"

"I don't know." She answered and gulped, "He was Onigumo..."

With that, she started to tell Kaede the entire story.

-

"Make sure they are well-taken care of." He ordered. "If Kikyou is harmed in any way, I will kill you."

"Yes, M' Lord."

-

"Where were you?" she demanded sitting on the futon she shared with him.

"Out, my love." He answered. "Did you miss me?"

"Like a disease. Why did you bring my sister into this?"

"I thought you needed a companion, and you missed her dearly did you not?"

"You should have not brought her here. She should be free from you and this hell hole you've created."

"Such harsh words, Kikyou." He grinned and walked toward her. He knelt down in front of her and reached to touch her perfect face, only for her to flinch away. "Why must you be so stubborn my dear Kikyou? Why don't you just succumb to me?"

"I will never give in to you, I won't allow it!" she said a little too loudly. "You repulse me, you violated me, how can I love someone who would do such immoral things? You are a murderer and a rapist and I cannot love an abomination such as yourself!"

"I suspected you'd say such things." He replied. "Kikyou, so defiant. Onigumo wished to see you this way, and revel in it." _Looks like he got his wish._ "You are indeed a rare jewel."

"Why must I share a chamber with you?" changing the subject. She didn't want the reminder of her falter, of how the thief she cared for, lusted after her, and wanted her so much that he sold his soul to demons, to wipe that impassive facade she always wore. Kikyou thought about keeping the facade, having Onigumo not have the pleasure of seeing her this way; but she knew it would anger him more, and Naraku would probably find more unusual, cruel punishments to draw her emotions out.

His tortures were enough, she didn't want more, and she no longer cared to keep pretending it had no effect on her because she had lost the jewel and no longer protected it; therefore, had no reason to continue wearing her mask. Kikyou kept thinking if she had abandoned him, not tended to him, he'd be dead; and there would be no Naraku, and she would be with Inuyasha.

"I hardly sleep. This is mostly yours."

"Then what do you do at night? Murder more innocent people _Onigumo?"_

"Kikyou, retire now." He said, ignoring and leaving her.

-

"M' Lady, you must eat." The servant commented. "His Majesty ordered for you to be taken care of. It's not poison, if that's what you're worried about."

"I refuse to obey, that bastard." She hissed. "You know nothing of his true nature, the slaughtering was just a warning."

"Oneesama, I don't want you starve, just eat a few bites." Kaede then looked at the servant. "Why do serve him?"

"I value my life, Miss." She answered the girl, but her eyes widened, and she was suddenly a little frightened of the former protectress of the Shikon Jewel, as Kikyou said bitterly, "You're better off dead."

-

**Author's Note: **Thank you Kaze Kitsune, ladyofcamlann, Splurg, and Frost. I am very honored and happy that you reviewed.I must say I was tempted to spell Kikyou without the 'u', and it looks pretty with or without it, I think. Oh the last quote was originally: _You're better off in the afterlife._ But I wanted it to sound harsh, so changed it.

**Frost: **Well here ya go! Thank you for the review. :)

**Splurg :** You're very kind and I had always intended for her to find out. That is one of the reasons I wanted to do a sequel. Thank you for the review and 'A' plus? You are too generous. :) Yes, I've also been hoping someone would write a fic where Naraku got what he wanted, but sadly no, so I took matters to my own hands.

**ladyofcamlann: **Yes, it's a little downer to see many hits but so little reviews, it makes one think 'Was the story bad?' or 'Are you people lazy or something?' NarKik fan huh? Hehe yes, the pairing is tempting if I say so myself. I mean he loves her, she loves another, he hates her, she hates him, he tries to get rid of his feelings for her, she confuses him, and etc. Besides, with those two teamed up together, the whole Inuyasha group plus Kouga and all, would have a _very _hard chance, right? Imagine them having a kid together, my my he'd/she'd be very powerful. Though you might not like this fic anymore, if I decide to go all the way. I had planned on bringing certain familiar characters into play, though I still don't know. Thank you for the review and compliments, you are too kind. :) Oh and it _is_ shocking there's very few NarKik. Also, thanks for the review in _What Might Have Been_ and now that I think about it, it is a bit odd having them have four children.

**Kaze Kitsune: **You're favs and alerts? You're so sweet! I've seen your profile and I see you like NarKik but I don't know if that's going to stay, if I do this story the way I originally planned it. Though I hope you continue to read my fic all the way through. Thank you for dropping a review:) And I agree, Kagome would _never_ get together with Naraku, I wonder who thought of that.

Thank you all for reviewing and compliments, you're all so nice! Thank you. Those who do read this but don't leave a review, I am also thankful for your time.

Please review or leave a constructive criticism, if you can. And if you sign in or give a hint you have an account but can't/won't login, thank you, I like seeing profiles.

So should I end it there? Or should I continue? Because usually I'd like to finish an entire story before posting, so I don't have to worry about the story being incomplete, and this story is not completely written (it's all in my head).


	3. Life

**Disclaimer: **Inuyasha is not mine, read the previous chapter.

3/29/06: This has been edited, so hopefully it's better (grammer-wise and spelling)

**Never**

**Life**

**X**

-

**X**

Life in the castle was different from life in the village. They had servants doing their bidding and chores. While it seemed nice, life in the castle and life in the village was very much the same for Kikyou. In the village where she protected the jewel, she was a prisoner; while in the castle, she was also a prisoner to Naraku. It was infuriating that she was forced to live with a beast who ravished her, and then forced her to marry him. Though it was a beautiful wedding, but private, and the celebration was large, it brought no happiness to the former priestess, as she resented being the monster's wife.

After a while, the sisters had started to gain a few company. It seemed that Naraku, with the help of the jewel, could now create his children. Two demoness stayed with Kaede and Kikyou, while the others were off to torment more souls. The first one was this small girl, named Kanna. She seemed void, though. Then again, how else would a demoness of void, act? The second was a beautiful woman, who had the spirit of the wind. The sorceress Kagura, who had similar personalities to her so-called 'mother'.

-

_I don't see how he treats her, I hear none of how he beats her, I don't hear her cries at night, but despite it all I know. I know how he makes Oneesama cry, I know how he tortures her, I know. I know this because I know my sister. The look in her eyes is even worst than they were before. She looks so sad, not like her time with Inuyasha, not like that night she applied paint on her lips. _

_I hate him for doing this to Oneesama._

_He made her unhappy. _

_Kikyou-oneesama probably suppresses her cry, to keep me from coming. Or that demon brings her to dungeon, or he gags her._

_There are nights when she sleeps by my side, and I am joyed. _

_There are nights when a doctor is summoned and I am angered. I go to that husband of hers and defend my sister, in the end I am powerless. He does not strike me, for Oneesama would be crossed, but he sends the guards or servants or my nurse maid to take me to my chambers._

_Hah. A nurse maid. I don't need a nurse maid. Though I must admit, she is good company. _

_Life in this castle is like a prison. The air is suffocating and nature is grave. _

_Sure, I am given any items I desire. I am adorned with jewelry and fine silk, but it's still just a gilded cage. _

_I look forward to going outside, to the gardens and sometimes outside the castle walls when I'm riding my horse; with guards, making sure I don't escape. _

_My sister on the other hand is not as free as I am. _

_Her attires are beautiful and she looks beautiful, but she is under very close and constant watch. _

_She is not allowed to go horseback riding with me, unless one of Naraku's demons are accompanying us. While on the other hand, he is out conquering. _

_We speak, with me speaking with contempt and my eyes are glaring toward him. He either ignores me, or he talks in return, with amusement in his voice. _

_Damn him. _

_Naraku. _

_Hell._

_How fitting. _

_And now he has dragged my sister into it as well._

_His "children." I feel sorry for them as well. Most of them hate serving him, such as Kagura. Kanna on the other hand, my little "playmate" is very faithful and shows nothing. She's ''daddy's little girl." Kagura, she may be temperate, stubborn, and fiery but I like her anyway. _

_But deep-deep down, I must admit, if I had let Onee-sama die, peacefully, she and I would not be in this predicament. She would not be hurting._

_I would not be hurting._

_I now know, I was wrong to ask my sister of this. I hate myself for it, despite that I did not know the curse of the jewel, I still hate myself for it. _

_She is suffering because of me._

_It's my fault._

_-_

"Kagura, where's Oneesama?" Kaede asked worried, "I haven't seen her all day."

"Chill out little girl, she's at the garden." Kagura replied, her fan near her face, "She seems to be in deep thought."

_Deep thought? Did that bastard hurt her again? Should I go to her?_ Kaede thanked the wind sorceress and walked toward the garden where her sister was. There, she saw her with Kanna and a few guards. She did seem like she was in deep thought, and Kaede wondered what was floating in her sister's head. Kikyou had sighed and called Kaede, saying she knew she was there.

_Well, her intuition still works. _"Yes Oneesama."

"Come Kaede, we have things to talk about." She held her hand out for Kaede and she held onto it. They walked to Kaede's chamber and there was a guard nearby outside, Kikyou and Kaede sat down on the floor. Kikyou looked at her sister, well and hard, "Kaede, are you happy here?" Kaede was shocked, and her sister's eyes pierced through, wanting to see the truth in her eyes just in case she lied to her. Kikyou was very good at intimidating people sometimes, and her glares were always scary, "Yes Oneesama."

"Why?" she asked skeptically.

"B'cuz Oneesama, I am with you."

Her heart fluttered, was she really content being with her? "Oh, Kaede..."

"I mean yeah, sure it's hard having guards, servants, and even nursemaids watch you, but as long as I am with you, Kikyou-Oneesama, I am happy."

"I love you Kaede."

"I love you too, Oneesama." They hugged, then Kaede pulled away, "But are _you_ happy? I know you're sad, I know you're not happy."

"What makes you say such?"

"You never play with me, you always say 'not today', it's always Kagura or Kanna. Kanna can be very boring, and Kagura's fun to play with but, she's always out on errands. You try to hide your emotions, sister, but I can see through the charade, you're sad and it's all because of _him_."

"Kaede...I..."

"And because of me," she mumbled sadly.

"What?"

"I can't blame you, I am at fault as well. I asked you to live on, when I shouldn't have." She continued, "You have every right to be angry at me and to hate me, even. Maybe that's why you don't play with me any more."

"Nonsense Kaede! I hate you not!" she chided her sister for thinking so, "I love you. _I_ am the reason this all happened. I should not have fallen for Naraku's tricks. I should not have fallen in love." _Neither should've Inuyasha. _"And you did not ask me to wish on the jewel to live, remember? _I _did that on my own. I am so sorry I made you feel like this, but this is **not** your fault, okay? This is mine, and mine alone." She said sorrowfully to Kaede.

"Kikyou-oneesama..."

"Now," she began, changing the subject, "what game shall we play?"

-

"Well well," the woman smiled, "how's married life?" she laughed. The woman flipped her long black hair away from her face, revealing her beautiful eyes. Kikyou glared at the vain woman, "I should wring your neck for what you did." The woman's smile grew wider, "I was only following orders, _Lady Kikyou_. Cannot punish someone for doing so, can you? Oh wait...I forget, you are heartless and always have a smug face. Hmph. In my opinion you deserved what you got."

"So did you."

"You wretched woman," she replied to Kikyou, "if not for you, my face would not be scarred! I was thrilled to be the priestess to bind you to Naraku. Seeing your melancholy face at your wedding was overjoying." The dark priestess laughed. Who else would Naraku ask to bind him and Kikyou but a dark priestess or priest? He decided that Tsubaki should have the honor. "Kikyou is that a mark on your face? Oh how the great priestess has fallen. He hits you, doesn't he? And I'll bet he does more than hit you."

"What are you doing here?" Kikyou kept her emotion in tact. Although she was tempted to tell her to 'shut up'.

"What's wrong? Did I strike a cord?" she eyed her rival, "If you must know, your husband has asked for me." Kagura then appeared and went to the two women, "Tsubaki, Naraku will see you now." Tsubaki gave one last glance at Kikyou, "Well, must be off. I hope your hand has healed from the cut." She meant when Kikyou's hand was cut to join her blood with Naraku's, at the wedding. "Poor thing."

"Tsubaki, you believe me of the one more pitiful. You are, however, wrong. I can see what you did, selling your soul to a low- leveled demon for eternal youth and beauty. How pathetic."

Tsubaki flared, "Who are you talk? Are you not forever youthful? Is your life span not of a demon's? Hah. Don't toy with me, I see what the jewel has done to you. I care not, if it was against your will. We are the same, whether you see it or not, bitch."

"Wrong, despite my prolonged life span, I am still human. I still have a soul."_ And I am still as fragile as a human...I do not have the strength of demons or hanyou._

With that, the dark priestess left, not waiting for Kagura to lead her to Naraku, unable to counter what was just said. Kikyou turned toward the wind sorceress, "Kagura, what does Naraku want with her? To kill her, I hope."

Kagura smiled, "You'd like that, wouldn't you? Naraku is gathering _helpers_ to aid him with those opposing him. I guess she is one of many."

"Hmph. Too bad."

-

"Please don't..." she whispered as Naraku undressed her, nipping on her hot flesh as she tried to push him off her, his body lying on top of hers. He smirked, he loved to hear her beg, he loved to hear her scream, he loved to see her as such, "Why Kikyou? It's a perfect night, the moon is full and you, my love, are in heat."

"Naraku...Don't do this...Not tonight..."

"Kikyou, you know how this is going, why fight it?"

-

_"No! Get off me!" she had struggled to get up, get away from underneath him. "Bitch!" he hit her, hard, "You will do as I say, when I say- got it?"_

_"I won't be intimidated by a creature such as yourself! A hanyou who used the jewel for power because he didn't have any!" she screamed. He hit her again but harder, then he grabbed her by the throat, pulled and slammed her against the floor, Kikyou cried out in pain. Then, still having his hand around her neck, he carried her by her throat and slammed her against the wall. By this time, blood started to drip from her head. The former priestess wanted to black out, she wanted to be unconscious, unaware of the pain and situation she was in. Her thoughts were: Is he going to take me against the wall, right now, like he did that night when he ravished me against the walls of the cave? _

_On the other hand, Naraku was angry, her resistence and her words angered him, and he wanted to break her. He wanted to break that spirit of hers which fought him. He loved her and he hated her, he loved that fire in her and yet hated it because it fought him. Kikyou, indeed was a beautiful creature, a celestial maiden- no, a goddess that was sent for him and him only, he thought, so beautiful; so enticing; her creamy thighs; her warm, pale, and soft skin; her long ebony hair; and her eyes in which he could drown in forever- oh those brown orbs of hers which held all her emotions. Her darker emotions was what he loved most._

_"Kikyou, you're mine." He sneered and there against the wall he proved it to her. Like the night he claimed her virginity, he was rough._

_-_

They were both completely undressed now, his hand covering her mouth, he entered her. She gave a small yelp and bit his hand, but to no avail. He pounded into her body, as he took what he wanted from her- what he needed from her. He ravished her body, drinking in her scent, and her cries. He made sure she felt everything he did to her, he made sure her body didn't go numb, and he made sure she responded to his touch. He wanted her to want him as well, he wanted Kikyou to know it was him, Naraku, filling her up and not that mutt.

"Tell me you love me, Kikyou."

"No," No matter what pleasures he gave her, she would not admit she loved this wretched youkai, when she sincerely didn't. No. Even if he was pleasing her flesh, she would not say something so meaningful, to a man who meant nothing to her. She hated him not loved him.

"Say it bitch!"

_"Never!"_

"Kikyou I know you like what I'm doing to you," he replied, then added, "Say. You. Love. Me."

"No." His voice was intoxicating, and she almost lost her will. Almost.

What he was doing to her, she never felt anything like it before. She couldn't help but enjoyed it. Though the mere thought of remembering who was pleasing her, sickened her.

This was ecstasy, and she knew this wouldn't be the only time Naraku would do this to her- and she was right. Though, of course, this session of sex wasn't gentle, there were unkind things too.

She gave a small cry as his seed spilled into her womb. Naraku lied next to her, holding her as if afraid of losing her- afraid of her leaving. Naraku was proud of his 'work' , his scent was all over the woman. _Mine, _was the last thought from him before he drifted off. Kikyou on the other hand, didn't sleep for a while. She couldn't. She was haunted. Sure, she was thankful, this time, he didn't bruise her too much; or that he didn't take her to the dungeon; or even gag her; or torture her. (Burning, cutting, and any other ways he can think of) but still, she'd rather undergo that, then to have him 'make love' to her; she'd rather have Inuyasha do that.

_Here I am again, lying beside him, his arm around my waist. His touch is quite different from that of Inuyasha's. Inuyasha's embrace was strong yet gentle, while Naraku's is possessive, not wanting to lose me. His kisses are harsh, unkind, forceful, while with Inuyasha I had initiated it, with him returning it, deepening it; with him it was loving, passionate, and hot. _

_I should erase these thoughts from my mind, Inuyasha's not coming back, he will not be aiding me like he did. Naraku would kill me if he knew who I was thinking of, if he knew who I was comparing him to. _

_Damn him._

_I hate him._

_He stole away my happiness._

_He deceived me into sentencing my beloved into an eternal sleep._

_He will never, be half the being Inuyasha once was. _

_Never._

_-_

_Inuyasha..._

_Inuyasha I'm so sorry. _

_I didn't know._

_I didn't know it wasn't you._

_I couldn't sense his aura._

_I couldn't sense anything._

_Not anymore._

_Not after..._

_Not after falling in love with you. _

_I had lost my powers, I had fallen into Tsubaki's curse. Oh what a fool was I. I knew she placed a curse on me, and I had allowed it, then permitted myself to give my heart. I was arrogant, thinking I'd never fall in love. I thought I'd die, alone. I never imagined that I'd meet someone like you. _

_I curse my self. I should have countered the vain priestess' curse. I should have left Onigumo to die. I should have listened to Kaede, and now she is a prisoner in this dark castle as well. _

_By this rate, I'll be bearing the demon's child. Damnit all! It wasn't supposed to be like this! It wasn't supposed to be like this at all! I didn't know Inuyasha... I didn't know... Please forgive me._

_We were supposed to live together, as mortals. We were supposed to live together as husband and wife. And I hate NarAku for stealing that chance. _

_We were supposed to be together... _

_Inuyasha I would've been proud to carry your children._

_I would've been content just being with you, with our children, if we had any, and with Kaede. _

_Nothing else would've mattered; where we lived, the size of our home, whether you were human or not. _

_I would give anything so this fantasy would be realized. _

_Because Inuyasha, even after everything that has happened, I still love you._

-

**Author's Note: **I really like that last line. It was originally: _Because Inuyasha, I still love you._ But I felt that I should add more. Actually I felt I should add more to the chapter, that's why it took me so long to update. Did you like?

Okay the whole Kagura and Kikyou relationship thing I put in. Well a long time ago, when I read volume 18 of Inuyasha, finding out Naraku has feelings for Kikyou, I was...um...what word can I describe? Happy? Glad that there was a third triangle (first: KikInuKag second: InuKagKouga) that involved Kikyou instead of Kagome. Then I also realized that his 'daughters' started with 'K's like Kikyou, now I don't know how kanji works and this is probably insignificant but I thought it anyway. I was like 'Wow he named his daughters with the same first letter as the woman he loves! And if she didn't give him that chunk of the jewel they wouldn't have been "born"!' So I thought of Naraku, Kikyou, Kanna, and Kagura as a family; as a weird, dark and maybe creepy family, but a family , like the Adams Family!

But then again, I also thought about Kikyou being _Naraku's_ mother because she is a contributing character that created him. I mean, if Onigumo didn't want her so much; and she didn't meet Inuyasha and had fallen in love, to the point she lowered herself to an ordinary woman; then the demons couldn't have passed through her barrier and go to Onigumo and make a deal with him; thus not creating him. So to me, Kikyou's the 'mother' of Naraku, Naraku's offsprings, and Kagome. Hehe I'm rambling, and if you're still reading this, I applaud you for having a great attention span and having a great amount of patience. Thank you very, very much for listening.

Um should I stop there? Or continue? And should I go through with my original plan? Which would be something like this: Naraku has made Kikyou his, but after a wish, certain unwanted people come into play. A girl from the future and a hanyou resurrected. NarakuxKikyouxInuyasha

**Some feedback would be nice, if you can. Constructive criticism welcomed.**


	4. Elude

**Disclaimer: **Since September 2005 I have acquired the rights to Inuyasha...as if. Kikyou would have never died if I did.

**Elude**

Kikyou knew that this was no place for a young lady, and she refused to have Kaede live in an abdominal place. She knew that Naraku wouldn't be home for awhile, and though he never stayed away for too long, there's no way for him to be home so soon. "Onee-sama," Kikyou heard Kaede whisper. "Are you not joining me?"

"It's too risky," Kikyou replied. Naraku would never end his search for her, and in her condition, she could not afford to hide from him for too long. She opened the door and sighed in relief. "Once you're out of sight from the castle run as far as you can away from here. Don't go back to the village because Naraku might think to look for you there. Tell them you're orphaned—anything to make someone to take you in—Kaede are you listening to me?"

Kikyou turned around to find Naraku before her.

"Aren't you going to welcome me home?"

"You're back far earlier than I expected," Kikyou glared, moving in front of Kaede to block her from the monster. One of the last things she wanted was Naraku harming Kaede in any form. After all, it didn't escape Kikyou's thought that Naraku would take Kaede hostage, or punish her through Kaede.

"I can tell," he smirked. He walked toward her and grabbed her chin. "Send your dear sister back to her room or let her watch."

Kikyou gave no indication of fright or apprehension, but she obeyed his request because she didn't wish for Kaede to see what Naraku does to her when they're alone. When Kaede hesitated, Kikyou raised her voice and urged her to leave them be. Kaede however felt that it was wrong to abandon her sister, thus Naraku was forced to summon Kagura to take her away.

"You and I will talk later," the half-demon growled at his subordinate before turning his attention back to the former priestess. "You've been a disobedient wife."

"Aren't I always?" It wasn't sarcasm but fact.

Kikyou said no more as Naraku's lips descended on hers, and tore off her clothes.

* * *

Naraku woke up surprised at finding Kikyou awake before him. He observed her naked body marred with bruises and bite marks that he rejoiced in knowing that he was the cause of them. He wrapped his arms around her, "What's wrong my lovely Kikyou?"

"Let's make a deal," Kikyou began without preamble. "Let Kaede go for she has nothing to do with this. You want me, not her. If you give Kaede her freedom, I'll give you myself willingly."

Naraku grinned at her desperation but immediately disappointed her. "No."

"Why?" she asked, "you have no need of her."

"That's wrong you're wrong. If not for her, you would have probably taken your life already," Naraku pointed out. "I need her to keep you alive and in line."

"You….bastard," she turned around and attempted to hit him, but Naraku swiftly caught her offending hand and pinned it down to the futon. The woman cursed herself for losing her tremendous powers. Back in the day, she would have easily taken him to his grave.

Naraku looked at her with cold eyes. "If you cause me to hunt you down, I may lose my patience with you and kill your sister. I'll give you the courtesy of allowing you to watch as I slowly torture her to death. Would you prefer that?"

Kikyou was outrage, "Do so…and you will find yourself without a bargaining chip."

The man laughed, "I doubt you would really risk your dear sister's life in the first place. You've lost so much already, do you desire to deprive your little sister of her life too?"

Kikyou laughed bitterly, "You think you can ever win my affections with this? You are gravely mistaken, and in fact, I despise you more because of it."

Naraku licked her cheek and reminded her in whisper how the line between love and hate was so feeble.

* * *

Kagura couldn't help but feel sorry for the young girl. She was an unfortunate victim that was dragged into Naraku's mess. The wind sorceress knew of Kikyou's plan from the previous night and allowed herself to be put to sleep in hopes that the girl could escape. After all, as long as it wasn't Kikyou who vanished, she figured Naraku wouldn't be too angry. However, Kikyou's plan failed and her upcoming punishment will be for nothing.

She was lost in contemplation, when Naraku walked in. He startled her when he asked in a tone that promised pain, "What were you thinking?"

Kagura trembled in fear when she what lay in Naraku's hand. "That witch cast a spell on me," she replied, knowing that the excuse was pathetic and insufficient. When Naraku closed palm on the beating organ, Kagura found herself in agony. She clenched her chest and kneeled on the floor. She refused to scream—it would give him too much pleasure. She hated him and if it brought him grief, then so be it. It was her small comfort after he deprived her of her freedom.

Sadly, like always, Kagura did not last long. She screamed, and torturing her heart was not enough. He wanted blood too, and he would get it.

* * *

**A/N:** So…how long as it been? And I did state this fic was abandoned, didn't I? Inspiration struck and I had to finish—especially when we all found out that Naraku's desired wish was Kikyou even though he tried to kill her (and succeeded with the last one). He really does embody the trope "If I Can't Have You." He should be the poster villain for that trope! Although in the manga, it's more of wanting her heart and if he can't have it, he won't settle for anything less—not even taking her away by force. As you can tell, my fic is different.

In truth, I think you guys (if there are even any readers left) will become angry once you realize how I'm going to end this fic. It's not happy or sad. Reviews will determine how much faster I work. XD I know, I have no right after five years but please?


	5. Vesper

**Warning:** If mature and explicit materials offend you please leave. This story contains rape (if you haven't read the first chapter) and abortion.  
**Disclaimer: **Inuyasha is not mine. If it were, it would have ended LONG before it really did.

* * *

**Vesper**

It didn't take Kikyou a while to realize that the curse Naraku bestowed upon her was also extended to Kaede. As the servants aged and passed on, Kaede stopped aging on her fifteenth year. It had been over thirty years, and Kikyou still looked like the naïve young woman who fell into a half-demon's ruse. The country slowly turned into a constant battlefield.

She tried to deny it at first because it wasn't possible. She couldn't have had the ability to do so at her age…but the signs became too obvious, and she dreaded the possibility that the gods hated her so much to give her another curse. She didn't understand because her body had stopped aging, thus it didn't move forward or back. It was essentially frozen was it not? Did the jewel work in another way?

She abhorred the idea. She had already given birth to an abomination, and damn her if she gave birth to another. She was not destined to be the portal that unleashed hell.

* * *

Kagura endeavored to escape Naraku, only to fail miserably each time. She even asked the Lord of the Western Lands, who caught her eye, to help her but to no avail. The man could care less what anyone's problem was. She had several run ins with him due to Naraku's growing notoriety. Sesshoumaru, from what she heard, was the half-brother of Kikyou's former lover.

She didn't know what attracted her to him, but when the wind would blow his silver hair, she wished that she could run her fingers through them. He was strong, and she knew that if Sesshoumaru really wanted, the demon could take on Naraku.

Naraku was off again, but he made sure that Kikyou and Kaede were heavily guarded. He had Kanna with him to look in on them often. The despicable creature had mentioned recruiting seven mercenaries. The neighboring warlords became aware of Naraku's reputation and wished to be rid of him, and even arrogant demons wish him dead. Kagura didn't understand why Naraku would wish to recruit seven humans when they were no threat to him, but Naraku had a love for manipulation and treachery.

The demoness heard a vase break and knew instantly that it came from Naraku and Kikyou's room. Kagura sighed in exasperation, believing that the woman was more trouble than she was worth. She walked over to the spacious room and pushed aside the curtain—

Blood.

"W-what have you done?" Kagura was shocked.

The woman before her had tears streaming down her face. Who knew that she could still cry after so many years? One would have thought that by then, she would have no more to spare. The blood dripped from her hands.

"I will not," Kikyou gasped for breath, "give him an heir."

Kagura looked taken back, and immediately observed if the woman was going to die. It didn't seem like she was suffering from a severe wound. The room, although, smelled different. The tea had something laced in it….

"Milady, what's going on—" a servant cried, rushing toward her.

"Call Tsubaki immediately!" Kagura ordered the woman, as she caught the woman who just fainted. It would seem that the blood was caused by throwing the vase, and Kagura surmised that it was done in anger not in attempt suicide. It was wise though not to rule the attempt suicide out.

Kagura was tempted to drop the woman down a cliff for causing heartache for her again. Naraku will be furious. She didn't despise the woman, but whenever Naraku became angry when it concerned Kikyou—he was angry with everyone and Kagura was his favorite outlet to vent out his frustrations on.

* * *

"Why won't you let me through?" Kaede yelled. "Is Onee-sama all right? What's going on? Whose orders are you obeying because I'm sure that my sister would never—"

"We're under strict orders from the Priestess Tsubaki not to let anyone in." The guards held her off.

"And since when did you take orders from Tsubaki? I only follow my sister—and if I recall, that wench isn't the mistress of this castle!"

"Stop your incessant screaming," Tsubaki snapped as she emerged from the room. She glared that Kaede with annoyance. "If you care for your sister, allow her to rest."

The hairs on Kaede's neck stood, and the young woman knew without a doubt who had just arrived. She turned around and glared at him, "What did you do?" Kaede believed that Tsubaki and Naraku deserved each other, and deserved to burn in the pits of hell.

He merely sneered at her before walking past the guards. The dark priestess followed.

Kaede decided that now was as good as any day, and ran off.

"After her!" the guards cried.

"Leave her be," Kagura interjected. "We can take care of her later."

"What happened?" Naraku inquired as his crimson eyes beheld the lying woman before him. She seemed to be in deep slumber.

"Don't you know?" Tsubaki laughed. "I thought you would have guessed by now. I suppose not. She drank a potion that is meant to kill an unwanted child."

What the woman said held his interest. Kikyou had been pregnant?

"According to your offspring, Kagura, when she found Kikyou—she was bloody and swearing that she would not birth another Naraku."

* * *

Kaede wasn't naïve, and she knew that the demons had no intention of letting her go—but she had to try. Surprisingly, it was easy to dodge the human guards. As long as she was able to do what she intended, then she would return herself to Naraku's castle.

Her destination wasn't too far. She noticed that surrounding vicinity was far more deserted than it should be. She supposed that people learned to take another route since they wished to avoid Naraku. She prayed that the gods would be kind and allow her to meet a traveling merchant. The young lady should have learned her lesson by then because of Naraku, but Kaede adamantly believed that no one was worst than him.

Kaede had thought about taking her life to spare Kikyou the burden of worrying about her, but she knew that it could backfire on her. Naraku would ensure that Kikyou was his, and the death of a sister-in-law would not deter him. Kaede considered mercifully ending her sister's life, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. Kaede hated herself for being utterly selfish. It was her selfishness and Kikyou's selflessness that had paved way to Naraku making Kikyou his queen. While she may possess the body of a young lady, she was not mentally. Kaede had tried to end her life for the sake of her sister, because without her, Naraku had no bargaining chip. Each time, however, she wondered if the end of her life would suffice, or if it would make things worse for her sister.

* * *

"She is not a demon," Tsubaki reminded Naraku, "but she's not as frail as a normal human. If you value this wench, you ought to tread carefully for a few weeks. It's not prudent otherwise." The dark priestess didn't wait for his dismissal and walked out the room.

Naraku crept toward his wife and sat next to her sleeping body. "I should think you would have learn your lesson by now."

Kikyou stirred but did not wake. Naraku knew how the woman before him thought. Since he didn't know about the baby, she would argue that she did nothing wrong. _Besides_, he imagined her telling him_, I thought you didn't want to share me? _

"Did she succeed in killing it?"

Tsubaki eyed him before she answered.

* * *

Naraku remembered about Kikyou's sister and called for Kagura. "I think it's time that she returned home. After all, she has yet to see her sister."

"I highly doubt that Kikyou wants Kaede to see her in this condition—"

"Kagura," Naraku cut her off in annoyance. "Are you questioning my order?"

"No," Kagura feigned a bow and took her leave. It was best that she retrieved Kaede anyway.

* * *

After thanking the kind man (and the gods for answering her prayer), she wasted no time. Kaede realized that things were different since she was last there, and she briefly wondered what her friends looked like now. They surely must have been old, married, and with children and grandchildren.

The leaf she cast her spell on was still in her hand. While her magic was nothing like how her sister's used to be, it should be enough. She dropped the leaf down the well, and pleaded with fervor that the spell worked. _Please help us._

The wind whirled behind her, and Kagura called Kaede's name. "I'm here to take you back."

Kaede sighed, "I figured."

"Are you going to tell me what you are up to?"

"Are you going to tell me what happened to Kikyou-oneesama?"

Kagura remained silent, and Kaede figured that she would find out eventually. She walked toward the demon and took her place on the giant feather that was Kagura's transportation.

_Please…anyone…._ Kaede looked back at the well and the village that was once her home with melancholy eyes.

* * *

A/N: Umm yeah….Please review!


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